I have read two stories in the news lately about women who have just obviously had enough. The first one was a few months ago, when an 81-year-old woman in Florida was arrested while sitting topless on a park bench, drinking wine straight from the box. When the officers tried to arrest her, she tried to squirt them with the wine. This woman was done. D-O-N-E….done. She just wanted to sit on her park bench that morning and enjoy her wine. Then a few mornings ago in Texas, a woman was banned from her local Wal-Mart for a small infraction. This woman used an electric cart and rode around the Wal-Mart parking lot for three hours, while drinking wine out of a Pringles container. The store called the police and they tracked the woman down at a local restaurant and told her that she was banned from that store. Wow…….okay. Can you imagine being that poor woman? After three hours of roaming the parking lot, her Pringles can became too soggy to drink out of, so she went to get herself some breakfast. Then had to pause her pancake enjoyment to deal with the police. Totally unacceptable.
Sure, I’m poking fun of the entire situation, but don’t people ever wonder what led up to these crazy moments for these women? Now, I’m not sure about the Texan, but the 81-year-old in Florida had no prior criminal history and by all accounts led a nice, neat little life. I’ll tell you what happened – they had enough. If you sit back and think about it, hasn’t it all gotten to be a little bit too much? Women wear a bazillion different hats, and I for one have just had enough. We are expected to be great moms and wives, chefs, maids, event planners, taxi drivers, cheerleaders for all of our offspring’s extracurricular activities, a shoulder to cry on, community volunteers, fitness gurus, and exceptional employees at our day jobs. Hell…..a couple of nights a week I even have to be a porn star. Not to mention, we have to perform all of these tasks while looking fabulous! Trendy clothes, great hair, manicured nails, and don’t forget – you probably need to be in shape. Yeah………I’m so over it.
When my oldest son was in elementary school, I thought I had to be perfect. I worked all day, cooked every night, kept a clean house, and even made homemade cupcakes each time his class had a party. I would spend hours making these cupcakes from scratch that looked like reindeer, Frankenstein, turkeys, and even spider webs. Why? Because I thought that is what I was supposed to do. It took me years to realize that those children just wanted sugar. They didn’t care one bit that those cupcakes were fancy. They licked the icing off and mangled the cake as soon as they got their tiny hands on them. I didn’t need to come home and cook a gourmet meal or keep the house perfect to make my family happy. They wanted time with me. They overlooked a little clutter and gladly ate pizza if it meant I had time to devote to them.
Society holds women to impossible standards, and you see women running around trying to be perfect and keep it all together every day. These are the same women that we also see who are riddled with stress and anxiety, who are taking care of everyone but themselves, who are losing sleep, and whose relationships with their spouses and friends are suffering because they simply are overloaded. Does this sound familiar to you? When was the last time you had lunch with your girlfriends? Have you gone on a date with your husband lately? When was the last time you took a shower and didn’t rush through it or put off shaving your legs for another day? If you can’t remember when the last time you did these things was, it is time to slow down! Take a step back and reevaluate your life.
Your babies will only be babies for a blink of an eye. Slow down and play with them. They don’t want a perfect mom – they want YOU! They want a mom who is present and can take the time to listen to their stories and play with them. I will bet you good money that your husband would much rather have a happy wife that he can take to dinner and a movie, rather than a stressed out woman with perfect hair and nails that he rarely sees. It is okay to sometimes put your happiness and sanity above everything else in your life. It’s hard – it really is. But do it! Buy the store-bought cupcakes, leave work at a decent time and go home to your family, order the pizza, and learn to say no to things that don’t bring you happiness and joy. You’ll be making time for the things in life that really matter, and you may even find time to work on that porn star gig with your hubby.
Remember to lighten up on yourself and other women out there. We are all just doing the best we can. But if you happen to see me rolling around the Wal-Mart parking lot, drinking wine out of a Pringles can………mind ya business.
Beautifully Messy 